He is a graduate of the University of Utah and is a proud member of Actor's Equity since Last year she was privileged to play the tea-drinking wife who beat her husband with a hammer, and the year before she tackled the role of the Mormon mother of the Freebe Family. She is proud to be part of this longstanding tradition, and is excited to be spending her final summer in SLC laughing the days away with her SLAC family. She is a proud member of Actors' Equity Association. Jeanette also works in the television, film and voice over industry. John Rowland is a showman with a knack for eccentric characters with ridiculous voices.
Many thanks are also due his fellow cast members -- here's to 4 months together!! Playwrights Allen Nevins and Nancy Borgenicht. Musical Director Kevin Mathie. Stage Manager Janice Jenson. Assistant Stage Manager Penny Pendleton. Lighting Designer Jim Craig. Set Designer Keven Myhre. A free-spirited teacher, her hippy husband, a newly single carpenter, a flirty former actress and an over-achieving year-old begin a six-week creative drama class in a small Vermont town.
Shelby is a junior in the musical theatre department at Weber State University. Colleen is a proud member of the Actor's Equity Association. Michael can be seen and heard in countless radio and television spots as well as film. A union member in three U. An actor since Morgan has appeared in over plays. As a television and film actor, Morgan has been in some very good and some not so good films.
Queering Common Sense About Sex, Gender, and Sexuality
He once had three different feature films running on HBO at the same time, in one of which he died…horribly! Funny, and I admit very close to some of my own memorable situations Too close once or twice. Great Job! Must see Circle Mirror Transformation! This play offers something for everyone Our whole family loved it! Also, this is the time to renew your season tickets. Great entertainment for a great price! You'll love it! It surprised me and made me think. How did you become a Set Designer?
It all started back in nursery school. We were living in England at the time. Because my brothers were in school, they got to go see a play. So I was taken to see a play of Cinderella ; the only thing I remember about it was that the pumpkin turned into a carriage — and it was the most magical thing I had ever experienced in my life.
So then, whenever I had the opportunity to see a play, I would go. I remember there were times when no one else in my class would go, so my parents would drop me off and pick me up. In high school, I took some tech classes from Carol LaForge and worked on some shows. And I realized that there were people that designed sets for a living. Then I went to the U, and I was undecided on my major.
I happened to be in a general theatre class, and one of the requirements was that you had to attend a certain number of outside events. I can, too. Peter Willardson was the Lighting Designer at that time, and I did some lighting design. I was fortunate enough to get paid for my first design out at the Lagoon Opera House. I had art classes in junior high.
The art class that I took my freshman year of high school was taught by the football coach. Then in college, I took all the art classes I could in association with theatre. Her class was the first time where everything just clicked — that it was a craft. It both solidified me and just really opened me up. A friend of mine had designed the set for the show. It was still a new space for SLAC; there was no air conditioning, the seats were folding chairs… The play was set out in the desert, so they wanted sand in the theatre.
We got a wheelbarrow and planks and just hauled and hauled and hauled sand upstairs into the theatre. I helped build props for shows here and there. I had my ambitions of being a New York-based designer. I got accepted at NYU with a minor partial scholarship. I did not get accepted at Yale. I did the URTAs to do interviews and to brush up on speaking about my designs in front of groups; the URTAs had a big cattle call where you had five minutes to show your designs and sketches to an audience of professors from around the country.
I was surprised that a lot of the schools wanted a follow-up interview with me. The University of Michigan offered me a full ride. When I weighed the partial scholarship at NYU and the full ride and connections offered by the University of Michigan, I made the decision to go to the University of Michigan… There was also a real variety of strong performing arts programs, including an incredible opera department. You could design opera; you could design musical theatre. They had a mainstage theatre and two smaller spaces.
Your third year you had an internship away from college, and I was able to get an internship with Victor Di Napoli on Sesame Street and did that for a season, and then I did scene painting work back here, and it just evolved into where I am today. It was there for five years after I had come back and was working here.
I was doing costume design for a Babcock show that was going to be ending, and I had a show that I was working on here — Salt Lake Salt Lake. I said yes. You see those opportunities and you just fall into them — or you grab them. I filled in for a friend at the Promised Valley Playhouse, but that was before moving away. I was interviewed by the Hale Theatre at one point Do you have favorites? You know, not really. Theatre is such a fleeting experience. All of those people make that moment possible. From my own point of view, you have to be able to let go of things immediately, and I think that you have to live your life that way.
It is such an impermanent world. Each play is a new experience. I have repeated a couple of shows. I just sit down and go at it. No, I just read. The characters have to transport me, not the space. The characters inform where I go. Would you be designing differently if you had more money?
Ron was an artist and would come up with whatever and make it work. Beth gave me a structure: taking this artistic view and giving me a grounding of how to get from A to B to C to the final result. That helped click in both of those worlds, that there has to be a practical side to theatre as well as the artistic side.
The audience comes to see the play. Any space, any budget is going to determine what the play is. Theatre is a collaborative art. I believe that stories transform us and affect the way we live our lives. We learn who we are through stories. SLAC was fortunate enough to be one of the first regional theatres in America to produce it, to critical acclaim.
Alex is a graduate of the University of Utah with a B. I have always had a love for film, theatre and German Shepherds. Soon after high school I realized jobs such as construction and gardening really weren't for me. So I attended Utah State University. While there I studied Journalism but was quickly allured to the theatre arts, which I eventually made my major. I can't possibly express how lucky I feel to get to play this part, thank you so very much S.
SEAN J. Lies is ecstatic about making his SLAC debut, and in such an amazing piece! Sean would like to thank God for his talents and the blessings in his life; the production staff, cast and crew for making this such a memorable and educational experience; and last but not least his friends and family across the country for the continued support.
Frost has been seen in numerous regional, national, and local commercials, and has also done extensive voice work for various clients. Frost is based in Salt Lake City, Utah, and works as a business leadership coach, change management consultant, systems analyst, and curricular and media director, having won numerous TELLY awards. He strongly believes Utah is one of the vital front line trenches of a global transformation that is occurring.
Charles is the proud father of four wonderful adult friends, four splendid granddaughters, and a querulous west highland white terrier, named Deacon Bono. Film, Voiceover and other fun stuff at www. Christy is happy to be back at SLAC after some time away and is especially thrilled to do so in such a beautiful and challenging piece, working with so many extraordinary artists.
When Christy is not acting, she directs the occasional play or television commercial and is currently putting the finishing touches on her first short film. But his plays, which are invariably political, are rarely polemical. He forces the audience to identify with the marginalized — a humanizing act of the imagination. He was also awarded the Chicago Tribune Literary Prize for lifetime achievement.
He lives in Manhattan with his husband, Mark Harris. His work for the Utah Arts Festival includes site design for the 20 th Anniversary. James holds a B. For Pioneer Theatre Company, K. For Meat and Potato Theatre K. Many thanks to her family for all their love and support. Equity seeks to advance, promote and foster the art of live theatre as an essential component of our society.
Equity negotiates wages and working conditions, providing a wide range of benefits, including health and pension plans. The Equity emblem is our mark of excellence. See the show and join in the conversation. Email your thoughts to. I cannot believe that people make a pilgrimage to Broadway to see plays when right here in Salt Lake City they can see acting comparable, if not superior to, what they would see on Broadway.
Angels in America is perfection on a small intimate stage. The acting is beyond description in its excellence. Every member of the cast was exceptional. The emotions that they evoke in the audience are amazing. You feel overwhelming pain as the actors express their life situations that we all relate to, you laugh as the humor in our Mormon culture is poked fun of, you feel the love that is pure and expressed by many of the participants towards each other. One of my favorite scenes is the coffee shop with Alexis and Sean.
The ease that lines are delivered with such believability is amazing. Charles was frightening, passionate and amazing in his performance as Roy Cohn. The ghosts priors are delightful with their mannerisms and accents. You want to have spirits like that visiting your dreams. Every single detail is masterfully done.
The lines are not done by any of the actors as if they are memorized dialogue. They are truly channeling the character and you feel as if you are a voyeur watching a real-life situation in front of you. At times you feel as if you are intruding in their private lives and other times you want to be there to comfort, encourage, or laugh with them.
Every character has such amazing costumes and they are done with amazing detail. The scenery in its simplicity is exceptional as it transforms each environment into the actual setting. Simple pieces of metal transform the stage into hundreds of settings and environments. I will never be able to express my gratitude for the hours of work that the performers have put into perfecting this production. It is a masterpiece and sensational in every aspect.
Denied pleasure, women put their faith in self-denial. Post-menopausal women are not supposed to feel sexual. They are supposed to feel like mothers-in-law, since they are no longer capable of being mothers. Heterosexual reality for men is sexual, for women it is largely reproductive. The obverse of woman-hating is man-loving. We suggest that loathing of female sexuality is stimulated by more than fear of its independent character. There is also in the response to women a strong element of male empathy with male. In this light, the lesbian becomes the antithesis of woman. The lesbian is the living rejection of woman-hating.
Even more critically she is a living denial of female self-hatred. She is self-love and she loves what is despised. The social prohibitions placed on lesbianism are formulated from this understanding. Her own self-love, her love for women, could become contagious. If men began to love women, as lesbians do, if women began to love women, as lesbians do, empires at least would crumble.
Sexual joy would replace sexual fear. Bitterness and obstinacy only multiply the sufferings of the wife and the misdeeds of the husband. Hegel would make them stupid: "Women can, of course, be educated, but their minds are not adapted to the higher sciences, philosophy, or certain of the arts. But Freud goes further than God. To ensure conception, Freud advocates rape: "Nature has paid less careful attention to the demands of the female function than - 12 to those of masculinity.
- The Bioarchaeology of Socio-Sexual Lives | SpringerLink;
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Lesbian: it is a word so freighted with cultural, historical and sexual content that heretofore one dared not speak the thing it names. It has been a secret. It is like no other word in the language: it cannot enter ordinary speech; the word, and what it represents, must remain unspoken. To name a thing is to give it life. To have life is to have power. The man on the street calls the lesbian a "female faggot. The story of civilization has been the story of the phallus: its identity, its behavior on land and sea, its worship, in particular its peculiar property of always being co-present with superior brain cells.
The story of woman in this civilization has been the story of her relationship to the phallus. They have shown that male domination, with its accompanying myths of intellectual and sexual superiority, is a relatively new mark on the face of the earth. Whether there is real pre-historical fact behind them is not as important as the hope they give for the future.
Because we have been nameless, it is particularly important to lesbians that history - and culture-bearing words be named. Without a word, a thing does not socially, culturally, politically exist. The universe was imagined as a great mother. The stories were of the queen and her lovers; of the queen and her children. Any five-star general can understand why this history was obliterated: you cannot accomplish a thorough-going takeover of a people before you cause that people to forget the language, arts, religion, stories, myths that gave them identity, that made them real.
First, you must teach them to become something they are not and teach them to feel shame for what they — — 13 - have been. In time they will forget their past. Female amnesia is the pre-condition of what passes for human history. Women are only now regaining consciousness. As myth, she exploded into symbol and encapsulated all that men fear about women—and more: she has been used, as dream, to personify loss and guilt.
As nightmare, she is our rage and grief over what we miss in life—the full meaning of the erotic. Lesbian sexuality, quite literally, is about re-creation. It is the interface of mind, body, spirit. It is non-economic. It is for pleasure. Its materialization is in poetic knowledge of the life of the flesh. It is equal, because women together are equals and vehemence against the lesbian is vehemence against democracy as well as eroticism.
Women are multi-orgasmic and men are not; that physiological difference, though it is an expression primarily of sexual energy, carries over into different perceptions of their wider energy by women and men. To be a man is to feel a limitation on energy. One can either make love or make war. Men understand that they cannot have or be everything. To be a woman though is to have seemingly limitless energy.
Even God and Freud wonder at her capacity to love, and at her ability to survive without love. Her energy is always available. The discovery or re-discovery of female physiological fact has been the greatest challenge to masculinist order the world has ever experienced.
Women discovered that they had a clitoris; next, they felt what it could do; then, they understood that the clitoris is unique in the human anatomy, that its sole function is to give pleasure. At the same time, woman recognized that the penis is an accessory to sexual pleasure; at worst, an impediment.
Women observed that a penis is easily exhausted and that tongues, fingers, vibrators, water sprays, thighs, arms, legs, feet, toes—and another clitoris—are not. On the basis of this recognition, many women have learned that it is easier to produce work, as well as love, with a woman than it is with a man; that sometimes it is easier to raise children with another woman that it is with a man. Gradually, as man did before her, woman has begun to dream a culture, a civilization, based on the behavior of herself in orgasm— — — — — 14 — a system of radiating circles encompassing spirit as well as body.
She has, at last, learned from her flesh her meaning: what she is rather than what she is conventionally forced to become. It is simplest—and least misleading—to call this new creation lesbian. A little alcohol may permit a lot of sex, especially at first, when both of you may need some loosening of inhibitions. A lot of alcohol will deaden your nerve endings, making response extremely difficult if not impossible.
Two women who persist in trying to make love after heavy drinking are far more apt to end up with sore genitalia than anything resembling orgasm. Better save them for the morning. When heavy drinking assumes problem proportions, it seems to be a reaction to stress less associated with lesbianism than with the demands of a competitive, acquisitive business world. Anatomy of sex Organs such as the ovaries and the uterus are for procreation, not sex.
The genitals are the means to the former and the key to the latter, which is why we limit our discussion to them alone. To inspect her genitals without a mirror a woman would have to be a contortionist, but propping herself up with pillows in front of a mirror she has both hands free to separate her lips. Reaching down from the uppermost section, at the level of the pubic bone, is the clitoral shaft. Then you encounter the hood of the clitoris, which can be retracted for better viewing of that relatively small but powerful mass of erectile tissue that gives you most of your jollies. The larger folds of tissue more or less surrounding this whole area are the outer or major lips labia.
Farther down, around the vaginal opening, are the inner or minor lips. The whole area is the vulva and the skin separating vulva from anus is the perineum. Aside from these guidelines there is not a great deal to say except to repeat that no two women are built exactly the same, as the active lesbian soon discovers. The color and shape of the tissue— not to mention the amount and configuration of surrounding pubic hair—vary considerably.
It is often neglected by lesbians and non-gays to their disadvantage. Even then, some form of lubrication it can be as ordinary as butter is desirable. With your lover lying on her stomach, you start by massaging her buttocks gently, then more deeply this can be preceded by a back massage—see Backs and Massage.
You begin to part her buttocks and slip a hand in and out of her cleft, brushing the anus lightly. When you come to concentrate on the anus, your initial gestures should be no more than light, but deliberate, touches. Her anus should be responding to your touch with involuntary contractions and this is your clue that the time is right for entry. Sometimes she may want no more than part of a finger inside; at other times she may crave its full length. You should always follow her movements, gently alternating light thrusts and circular rubbing—this alone can bring some women to orgasm, especially if they have a pillow also rubbing against the clitoris.
This is best effected by letting her press her open labia against three fingers — — 18 — — middle, ring and pinkie while the index operates inside the vagina; a vibrator or dildo can take over the fingerwork. Face-to-face anal sex is a little more difficult for the active partner to effect; but, with practice, equally rewarding.
The face-to-face position is usually started and accompanied by vaginal and clitoral activity.
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In this instance, the middle finger enters the anus while the index of the same hand strokes the clitoris and enters the vagina. Very few lesbians in fact like anything as large as a dildo inserted into their anus, but beware of the insertion of small objects—they do get lost, as any hospital will tell you. It really comes down to fingers and, if you like them, dildos.
In all cases, however, objects that have entered the anus must not subsequently enter the vagina until they have been washed with soap and water. An aphrodisiac, therefore, is anything that turns you on: lying naked in the hot sun feeling your flesh melt, a glass of wine, a shared joint, a love note, music. But any aphrodisiac only works when used with delicacy: while a little wine, for instance, will inflame desire, too much will diminish performance. And the hot sun, while it opens you sensually, can put you to sleep.
Rationality, however, seldom affects the conditions of being in love, loving or lusting. It is, therefore, particularly important to be aware from the beginning that the afternoon of love will inevitably happen—but that you will have a choice, in this as in all other matters of love, about what you will do with it. You have reached the afternoon when you are doing the same thing in bed every time you make love together, when you always make love at the same time of the day or night—or, out of boredom, you are not making love at all.
When this happens—and it will—you can choose among the following: give up sex, or use it only for physical relief; continue to be with each other as a security against loneliness, enjoy dining together, movie-going together, playing together, even sleeping together, but finding sex in other places this choice works only if you have both honestly agreed that the arrangement is mutually satisfactory, and if your outside lovers also accept the situation before you go to bed with them ; recognize that while there is love there is hope for sexual renewal.
Stop waiting for inspiration to return and start creating it deliberately. Renew the pleasure of courtship: bring her a little gift or some flowers. The suiprised smile on her face may be just the aphrodisiac you need. Turn on some music instead of the television; open some wine instead of the evening paper. Buy a vibrator and let her watch you use it on yourself. This way you may turn your afternoon into the best sexual experience the two of you have enjoyed.
The Bioarchaeology of Socio-Sexual Lives
Armpits The authors of our straight counterpart, The Joy of Sex, strenuously object to deodorants and to shaving. As for smells, perhaps this is just one more area where women differ from men. But rare is the woman who will wax poetic over the odor or taste of armpit sweat. But not always. One lesbian describes arousal as accompanying an accomplished soprano in a Faure' song. There the union is sensual, not sexual. We think this may account for the intensity of lesbian love; the combination of similar temperaments and similarity of sensual experience is not duplicated in any other sexual union.
Lesbians often enjoy arousal for itself. For the straight, the uninitiated or the repressed, the back rub is the beginning and the end of sensual expression, but for the full-blown lesbian the back rub is one of the smoothest, most sensual entries into love- making. Further, it combines three important elements that form the basis for successful lovemaking: it profoundly relaxes and opens the body, it stimulates it and it conveys a message of caring and tenderness.
If your lover is too tired for sex at the end of a heavy day, she usually means that she is too tense to even imagine relaxing enough to respond. First you undress her; put her in a lukewarm shower for five minutes a hot bath at this point will send her straight to sleep ; take her out, briskly rub her dry and stretch her out, backside up, on the bed. If she has occasional twinges of lower back pain she will - 23 - — be more comfortable with a pillow beneath her pelvis. Her head should be against the mattress or resting on a thin pillow, her arms should be flat by her sides.
Push and rub hard into the muscles: your goal is to overwhelm the armor of tension resisting you. Sometimes this is so intense you may have to ball your hands into fists and pummel the shoulder area. Gradually move beneath the shoulder blades and onto the rib cage, pressing and rubbing with your palms flattened against her body. At intervals, return to the shoulders; at these times introduce a squeezing, lifting motion. Then return to the back proper, giving particular attention to each little knob of the spine with the tips of your fingers. If she is entirely relaxed and she should be by this point , her whole body should jiggle in rhythm with your fingers.
Keeping your hands lubricated with a lotion during the back rub not only facilitates their swim across her back but also increases the sensory content of the experience for her. Do not, however, pour lotion onto her back—the shock of something cold will produce quite the wrong effect. Rubbing the lotion into your hands first will warm it up and transmit both silkiness and your body heat. The crucial difference between a back rub and a lesbian back rub is in the matter of your ultimate goal: sex.
You can use your mouth too and surprise her with a well-aimed kiss on her tailbone. You can run your tongue, instead of your fingers, up and down her spine. If she has a pillow beneath her pelvis you can even reach her clitoris. Every lesbian who goes to gay bars does so because she knows that the people around her are like her. And lesbians are still prepared to pay her price. Poetry readings, no matter how moving, are no substitute for the slow grind on a pitch-dark dance floor; conferences are work, not romance; politically sponsored dances are about sisterhood, not sex.
And all of these alternative events shut down before the bars do: the lonely lesbian has more time to wait there and hope; the happy lesbian has more time to play. Bars for lesbians, despite some heavy sexual overtones, are not what they are for gay men. They are not principally about direct sexual availability. So it is unfortunate that the scared-to-death lesbian frequently adopts macho habits or their opposite timid-mouse habits to cure her aloneness.
Slamming the door open and stalking to the bar where you conduct a furtive ten-minute check for the love of your life is not the road to success any more than the chain-smoking crouch over a glass of beer. There is still a horrifyingly large number of lesbians who think that in a bar the proper approach to a woman they admire is a slap on her beautiful ass.
But hard and deliberate conditioning has trained many women into near-paralysis. In response, lesbians often adopt the grossly inappropriate habits of men to make moves toward each other. A genuinely female, a genuinely lesbian move toward another woman is most gracefully accomplished with an invitation to dance, where custom gives licence as talk, at first, frequently does not. And then can we talk and get to know each other?
Hours later, or weeks later, if there is personal mesh, sex may come of it as well as friendship or love. Certainly it beats sitting at home and watching straight couples get it together on TV. The straight-and-narrow advocates are, of course, entirely serving their best interests when, in preventing same-sex dancing, they hope to prevent same-sex sex. In a small space filled with women where there is just enough light to keep the sober from stumbling over tables and which is booming with sound that is little more than pelvic rhythms, the lesbian displays her body, shows what her body can do, invites another body to consider joining hers in the dance that dancing mimes.
Basics There are several different ways in which the basics of sex and love can be viewed. Knowledge of equipment: People who want to sexualize their relationship will usually stumble across ways to achieve it. It helps, of course, to have a clear idea of where things are and what does what. Information of this sort can be found under Anatomy of sex and the headings describing particular parts. Knowledge of procedures: This is the how of assuming different positions and the familiarity with techniques for kissing, fucking, sucking, rubbing, and all the many other activities women engage in while making love.
Another view: Basics can also be interpreted as those constituents without which making love is simply having sex. It is that sense of engagement between two people that converts having sex into making love. It could be that difficulty in recognizing and experiencing that difference is the principal reason for people seeking psychotherapy or other counsel. But given that a lesbian, just as any other well glued together person, both recognizes and experiences the difference, how does she express it in sexual activity?
It is all in the person, they say, not in the gender. Be that as it may this book is more about hows than whys. Still, in all, it remains the most common site for exploration and consummation. As with so many things, extremes are to be avoided. Too soft is not only unhealthy for the spinal column but it also overyields to create crevices and valleys that can trap parts of the body that ought to be accessible to strokes and kisses.
On the other hand, too hard a bed presents its own hazards. For example, prolonged sucking on a bed with not enough give for you or your partner can result in pain rather like that induced by a whiplash injury to the neck. Good-quality foam rubber of five-inch thickness, placed on a flat pine support, makes an excellent bed for lovemaking. This kind of bed also offers you a wider choice of width, height, length—even unusual shapes—than commercial mattresses on box springs. It is also easy to carry, so you can move it into the living-room if you so wish.
Big toe There is no portion of your body that is not capable of arousal or that cannot be used to arouse a lover. Toe-sucking clean toe-sucking is one of the more sensational erotic practices, but in form is simplicity itself. This is how it can most be enjoyed if you want to engage. You can grasp her feet firmly; separate her toes with your fingers, and as though they were lollipops suck each toe thoroughly in turn. A variation on this practice is to leave one hand free to work the clitoris and vagina while the other hand and the mouth stimulate the toes.
The big toe, by contrast, can be transformed into an active agent and be tireless at fucking in a way the fingers are not. Before beginning, make sure your feet are clean and your toes well manicured with no pernicious hang-nails: the aim is to produce moans, not shrieks. Both stretch out, hips to toes. Using both feet you part her thighs and begin rubbing her bush with the ball or heel of your foot. Gradually shift to your side, propping yourself up, if necessary, on an elbow and slip your big toe down around and into her vagina. As the big toe thrusts, the other four toes will be almost reflexively working against the inner labia and clitoris.
Of all sexual practices, toe-fucking is most amenable to simultaneous indulgence instead of taking turns: with only a foot engaged, the rest of the body is free to move to orgasm at its own — 29 - pace. Some women, however, prefer to masturbate with a hand or a dildo while they are toe-fucking their partner—or simply wait for their turn. In more restaurants than would care to be mentioned, toe-fucking is an unannounced item on the menu. And, of course, one shoe on and one shoe off. For the exceedingly liberated, toe-fucking is a means also of making love simultaneously to two women who will most likely be further stimulating each other as your feet perform.
Bisexuality Now that the essentially bisexual nature of human-kind is accepted as fact, the only thing left for concern is what one does with the information. Making love is. Very few gay people, men or women, are absolutely incapable of having sex with someone of the opposite gender. There are several explanations or rationales: experimentation, societal pressure and physical pleasure it is not in the least rare for lesbians to enjoy penetration, for which a penis can serve as well as other objects, nor for gay men from time to time to revel in the sensations of fucking a vagina rather than other orifices.
But where does that leave love as in lovemaking? Is it possible for a person to be equally attracted to members of either sex, and hence to love either? The problem is that, even among swingers, most people swing one way or the other. That tends to leave the real bisexual out in the cold. Straightforward word of advice: be true to yourself, and honest with people.
If you, a woman, fall in love with another woman you are being both true and honest when you act upon that love and enjoy the sensual pleasures you share. If the relationship develops and grows, your bisexuality—openly admitted and just as openly accepted—adds but one more dimension to the liaison: your choice is not just among all women but among all people. Bisexuality should never be used as a weapon.
Not too many lesbians seem to be caught up with the idea of exercising that much control over someone they love. Nor are that many lesbians turned on by the notion of hurting or being hurt—sadomasochism may be in vogue for gay men, but not for lesbians. The mouth opens to a wider and wider extent, in tempo with responses, and the teeth edge against, circle around or cautiously close up and down upon the site.
Earlobes, the juncture of neck and shoulder, breasts and nipples, the juncture of torso and thighs, and the whole genital area are for most women highly responsive spots. At orgasm your jaws can go into spasm, trapping your lover painfully between your teeth. If you should accidently be badly bitten enough to bring blood be sure to seek medical advice.
Experiment with distances, but keep in mind that the closer your mouth to her skin the more pointed and direct the airstream should be. One of the most effective warm-up acts before lovemaking requires only an ordinary hairdryer with ribbons and feathers attached to — With the temperature of the dryer set on warm, you spread her labia open with your free hand and let the air and its feathery embellishments play against her clitoris. This technique frequently arouses almost to orgasm, and if your fingers are active during the blowing process, it almost invariably achieves it.
Bondage Contrary to the persistent but utterly false myth—"Did you see that middle-aged woman trying to seduce that college girl? As with so many other things, attitude is the key. If either of you finds the idea in the least distasteful, better forgo the attempt. Another essential is that each of you must thoroughly trust the other. The whole point of bondage is to restrain one person from active participation; both the muscular and the emotional effects of this restraint increase sexual excitement and can lead to a sharply heightened orgasm.
Her lover may induce an exquisite build-up to the point of aching for contact by masturbating to orgasm in front of the bound partner. Each wrist and each ankle is tied separately, whether spread- eagle or with the lower limbs closer together. This pre-lovemaking conference can add to your mutual enjoyment by stimulating fantasies of what it will be like when you really do it. Bondage should be a game of love, not of spite. Especially when she wears tight jeans as well, this lesbian is presenting an image of herself she means you to understand as purely sexual: as she is turned on by wearing these boots, she means you to be turned on by watching her move in them.
Heavy boots are not restricted to butches. They are usually not worn these days to signify sexual roles but to show liberation from the restriction of roles. Boot- wearing, however, typically ends at the bedroom door: on the feet, up to the knees, they are erotic foreplay; in bed, they mean little more than torn sheets. For really special occasions, champagne and orange juice half and hall or a bloody mary will be good for starters.
Plain orange or tomato juice are fine, but less festive. Try holding a modest amount in your mouth so your lover can suck it into her own as you kiss. Try putting tiny drops on her nipples and then licking it off. Try talking dirty into your glass as you peek over its rim to watch her reactions. And, by all means, trade off. The main course should be elaborate in the sense of being special or non-workday, but simple to prepare.
Sex Medals : A Somewhat Anthology of Carnal Accomplishments
This is a moment to savor, not for rushing from the bed to turn over something in a frying pan. Fried eggs on frozen waffles are very quick to do, but cold food is even easier. When you return to bed with the serving trays it is time not only for leisurely eating but for more pecking, nibbling, kisses, fondling and, eventually, what have you.
By all means, feed each other. Who but another woman can know the pleasure of a close embrace—breast to breast? A natural is attending to one breast by mouth and the other by hand, alternating as you proceed. You can stroke feathery light, then heavier knead, run the fingernails against and generally fondle the whole area. You can trace from the armpit down around the bottom of the breast, then up along the breastbone and out along the clavicle. The nipple itself can be flicked, encircled, gently pulled, then you can focus on the motion or combination of motions she seems most to enjoy.
Mouth contact will probably evoke the more excited response. The mouth should not neglect the same lines and curves the hand is tracing; bathe each section in broad tongue-washes and kisses of varying intensity. Approach the nipple with the tongue tip, working round and round it before kissing. You can suck and pull gently harder if she desires ; lick both with the tip of the tongue and with its full breadth.
If your lover is lying flat on her back, you can approach from the side at a slight diagonal. The knee closest to her head is placed — - 36 - - by her shoulder, with most of your torso aimed footward. The other knee is somewhere near the middle of her arm. As you lean over her to kiss and suck the breast and nipple on the side farthest from where you are kneeling, your own breast falls to her mouth.
There are many variations—for example, kneeling directly above her head and simply leaning downward—and anatomical differences will dictate the position which is most comfortable and satisfying. If you imagine it as a little forest guarding entry to the pleasure dome it surrounds it can take on the richness of fantasy, and when that happens the bush begins to get the attention it deserves.
You can twirl it in your fingers, brush your face against it, use a soft brush on it, stroke it, pull it. Decorate it with a little bow and then go down on her. Both roles were adopted and acted out with dead seriousness, with very little deviation. Pathetically, this behavior was generally a parody of the worst heterosexual coupling: the butch stomping and hen-pecked, the femme kittenish and nagging. The straight double-standard in sexual activity also operated among such couples, the butch feeling compelled whether she wanted to or not to act like a tomcat, and the femme constrained to the purely monogamous attachment.
In some instances the butch would refuse to undress for bed, at least from the waist up: the sight of breasts would blow the masculine image for the femme and weaken the necessary self- image for the butch. The fantasy was more critical to the butch than sexual pleasure. The femme could even as a lot of old lesbian porn and pulp romances indicate as easily go with a man and continue to play the passive, submissive role in bed and out, but this happened rarely. We write as if this situation is all in the past—and for the most part it is. With heightened awareness of sexual possibilities and variety, fewer people are entertained for very long by role-playing.
In visual terms, however, different lesbians mean different things when they think of "a good ass. In this, your right or left knee is supporting you between her legs and your knees can be giving her clitoral stimulation too in this position while your other knee is against her waist. If you are rubbing on her left buttock, you can also employ your right hand and fingers in her crotch, using your right knee against your hand for added pressure.
Mutual orgasm is very possible in this position. But, if one equates celibacy with abstinence, then there are certainly times at which an individual may choose to abstain. But we feel this is definitely an individual choice, and therefore would not presume to enumerate examples of what we as individuals may judge to be sound reasons.
We would, however, suggest serious questioning and reconsideration of any strictures imposed by societal, religious or intrapsychic canons against lesbian lovemaking. Cheeks A compliment paid to your facial cheeks may well be meant to flatter the cheeks on the other side of your body. Therefore children of lesbians have always existed.
The reasons are simple. Up until the present century most lesbians who bore children stayed within the heterosexual family framework. They had little choice, given the economic structure. Children from such a background tended to grow up cool, cautious and distant, always afraid of something they could sense, but which was never discussed. This pattern was broken in the earlier decades of this century— but often only in comfortable, upper-class settings especially in England , where it was, at least relatively and with discretion, O.
Children were free to respond accordingly. It took a while for this attitude to cross class lines and the ocean. These adults at least all the ones we know of are truly beautiful people. Maybe because they were freed from the Blessed Product myth see Lesbian motherhood -, maybe because, more than other children, they grew up in an atmosphere of tolerance and acceptance; maybe because they understood quite early on that they could be themselves—not an extension of daddy or mommy ; maybe because they were not lied to. For example, "I never felt any of that guilt the kids of divorced parents often feel.
She knows that there is nothing dirty about mother or queer about her homosexuality, but she will need guidance. In later childhood or early adolescence when differences often seem so threatening, children of lesbians may wish their family were more standard. One approach is to collaborate on a list of all the things you both like and enjoy about your family; sometimes sharpening the differences can help to level the value judgments of good and bad.
A surprising number of children of lesbians experience a sense of crisis and trauma when, in their late teens or early twenties, they become aware of their own sexuality and discover they are straight. Surprising because we know, personally or clinically, of no lesbian to whom the matter has been of great concern. If you agree that outside intervention might be helpful, seek a mental health professional who is sympathetic to the problem and experienced in dealing with it.
The flip side of the situation can occur if your child does choose homosexuality. On the one hand, it should not matter. Close, sincere, mutually introspective discussion with your child, with or without a counselor, should do the trick. Finally, one should always bear in mind that the children of lesbians learn like the children of any people.
When attacks on gays are made, the image bigots have in mind is typically male, stereotypically "faggot. Those men and their women who persecute homosexual males hate and fear, more than any other thing, women and "the feminine. Those who attempt to deny homosexuals jobs and housing also are opposed to abortion, lesbian motherhood, equal pay for equal work, a woman a Black or a Jew in the White House, and freedom of any religious, political or sexual choice. And finally, it also referred to the public transgression of morals, the conscious refusal to hide behind the veil of secrecy, and thus openly challenging established norms and values.
As in the story of Lot and the people of Sodom and Gomorrah , homosexual behaviour had become symptomatic of evil behaviour in general. Homosexuality was not only regarded as evil in itself, but also provided a convenient label for stigmatizing bad people in general. During this revolutionary period in Iran the term was used as a generic label, applied to persons who were considered, rightly or wrongly, to be criminals.
It did not matter what they did exactly, it was enough to know they were anti-social and therefore evil. In this way, for example, political enemies were eliminated without any legal justification whatsoever. It is a historic tradition that in a situation of political, economic, and social instability, internal chaos will be blamed on outsiders and foreigners.
And this made the homosexual a perfect scapegoat. It brought to mind the sexual ambivalence of T. His bizarre psychosexual identification with the Arabs was the root of his political beliefs. Do you know what buggers are? What do you think of that? The purple deepened on his fat cheeks. Having spat once, he spat again; the action appeared to stimulate him. Soon his chin was covered with saliva. And sinking on to the bed, he burst into tears.
After the Second World War not much changed in regard to the attitude towards homosexuality. Homosexuals were still regarded as an alien class of humans, diabolical and separate from normal people. To stop this plague, police agent-provocateurs were sent out to entrap homosexuals through solicitation. The Metropolitan Police even formed a special division solely to patrol public urinals, and consequently the number of prosecutions for homosexual offences skyrocketed. Even powerful and famous men actors, politicians and lords were paraded as examples in the press.
Readers could discern such a person by his sedate tweed jacket, suede shoes and pipe, or alternately by his telltale effeminate manner and mincing steps. They were considered to be the worst of the worst, and their lying and manipulating way of life made them even more dangerous. It was in this atmosphere that family, friends, and colleagues of TE were suddenly confronted with public accusations of TE being a homosexual.
An early example of the irritation his behaviour created is given by Lieutenant-Colonel Cyril Wilson , the British representative in Jeddah, in I look on him as a bumptious young ass who spoils his undoubted knowledge of Syrian Arabs etc. From the moment they met, there was an immediate tension between them. Countless tales! Well, well. The charge was quite unfounded. He liked to shock. And it is even possible that he asked them to include it in their respective articles for Friends , particularly since he himself decided to write an article for the book, in which he denied the rumours that TE was homosexual.
The men involved always denied and even fiercely resented any suggestion of homosexuality being ascribed to their relationships with TE. The poem was mainly a literary exercise influenced by English verse of the nineties intended to recall not only the dead friend, but also the cast-off self of his own youth. Finally, Arnold said, his brother had stated in his letters with the utmost clarity that he had very rarely felt physical inclination towards any person, and had lived in complete celibacy toward both sexes.
In the end Arnold decided against publication of his defence in Friends , probably because he came to feel or was advised , that the arguments employed were weak. A loyal fraternal reaction might have done little to convince most readers, while the arguments could have added fuel to the fire, and only have led to more suspicions. Still he chose to include the defences by Thomas and Woolley, since a response by two publicly well-known people, with a reputation in their respective fields, might be taken more seriously.
The question that still puzzles me however, is why Arnold felt the need to go public with it? Were the gossip and rumours so outrageous that he felt he just had to protect the reputation of his family, of intimate friends and of the people who had worked and lived with TE in the military, from being harmed? And since getting it out in the open could have just as easily ended up being counter-productive, was it worth the risk? Aldington and TE had much in common. According to Aldington, he was the one who really suffered during the war, while TE had a very easy time.
All in all TE came to represent everything Aldington hated. It made him desperate to prove to the world that TE was an habitual poseur and liar, and even a criminal who belonged in jail. Aldington could have produced a masterpiece, since it was the first book which looked with a critical eye at the myth of Lawrence of Arabia.
But during his research and writing, his hatred and prejudices took over, and more and more he wanted to prove that TE was a homosexual, and therefore an untrustworthy, criminal and evil person. He was driven to despair by ruin and only saved by his friends. Some people advised the group to do as TE would have done, and not to take Aldington and his accusations so seriously. Their own reputation was at stake, since they were known to be close to TE, and now their friend was suddenly accused of being a liar and a criminal.
They were a little bit different, nothing wrong with that, but different can be dangerous when you are publicly known to be a friend of someone who is accused of being evil. As one the early biographers of TE , he was suddenly under personal attack, since he was indirectly accused by Aldington of not having told the whole story. For Hart, friendship with TE had become immensely important, which led him occasionally to disregard the facts.
TE had contributed greatly to his book, and Hart was well aware of the fact that some of the information he had given him could not have been true, which Aldington now suggested. Since his reputation as a biographer and as an expert on military history depended on it, it was inevitable that he should take up the fight, and so Hart became the informal leader of a loosely organized group of friends of TE. The problem with Hart was that he had something hidden in his own sexual closet, which was the fact that he was a fetishist and exhibitionist with a mania for corsetry.
For him the effect it produced was morally improving, aesthetically pleasing and sexually arousing. His corset-mania involved transvestism, the designing and wearing of wasp-waisted corsets, as well as designing them for his wife to wear. While second-in-command of a company on the Somme during the First World War, he was shelled and gassed. He returned to England with phosgene poisoning, anxieties about his own courage in action he had understandably given way to his fear and panicked , manic delusions of military greatness, hypochondria, and impotence.
His wife was a voluptuous woman and a biddable mannequin, and the sensational impression she made was partly created by him, since he was the one who shaped and draped her. After their divorce in , his corset-mania was transferred to his second wife and her daughters. Hart threatened to go on hunger strike unless they did as he insisted, namely, abandon their country clothes and wear the high heels, stockings and corsets he had measured for them. Even in his ideas about TE, his fetishism shines through.
Both were extremely loyal to TE and very grateful for his friendship. For Eric, TE was all important because he had provided him with paid work and a great reputation as an artist, while Celandine felt TE had saved her life. He had been good to her when she suffered from depression, particularly in the period after she had a dreadful miscarriage.
He talked to her, clarifying all her fears and she felt understood completely. When the journal Housewife published her article about TE in , she was ecstatic by the thought that it would reach millions of women. At that time there was no medication for it, which meant that episodes of psychosis and depression would alternate periodically and unexpectedly, giving them and their children very hard times to get through.
At the time, he was having financial problems, and TE wanted to help his friend, but at the same time keep control over what was being written about himself. The illegitimacy had now become public and she would be devastated, being reminded of her sins. L, whom I admire and love, before her death. Yet this bad taste will be more damaging to A than anything else. To counter Aldington, Graves publicly denied the accusations of homosexuality. He suggested that TE was impotent after his rape at Deraa in A fact which was of great importance, since only acts were criminalized.
Worse was to come, because in July , the boy was arrested for soliciting with a corporal in a Canadian regiment. It is clear that for Graves, and for many men of his time like Aldington, and probably TE too , there was a big difference between chaste manly love and homosexuality. The opposite sex is despised and treated as something obscene. Many boys never recover from this perversion.